You know those things you do once so you never have to do them again? Eating durian was like that for me.

FRIEND: IN your house?!

ME: Yes, inside. And when we were done carving it up, the trash went out immediately.

I acquired this at Asian Market in Saginaw, an Asian grocery store where it seems like you can get nearly anything. My son, 29 and an adventurous eater, was curious but wary; my mate had no interest. The smell didn’t drive anyone out of the house, man or beast. We didn’t offer a taste to the Lab technician.

The verdict: tastes like spoiled onions. Softer than expected. My son vehemently objected to the texture and wants nothing more to do with durian ever. I probably will try it again if I encounter it, but I’m unlikely to buy more.